Fulfillment

I worry a lot about what other people think of me. I have for the majority of my life. It has held me back at times, but also kept me from making a fool of myself at other times. Sometimes it's meant that I keep from doing something I love for fear of being judged. Other times it's kept me from being completely fulfilled in my life.

Not anymore!

Two weeks ago on August 10th was my last day of work. I am officially a homemaker and soon to be stay-at-home mom. When telling my in-laws for instance that I no longer was working my stomach jumped and felt a twinge of worry of how they'll view me. They always knew I was going to stay home once the baby was born, but I don't think they thought I'd be through with work so soon.

My mother-in-law had my husband and 6-8 weeks later was back at work and probably wishing she could have gone back sooner. While I don't necessarily agree with that mentality; I have the feeling that a mother's place is at home raising her children. I try no to judge those who don't think that way and I hope not to be judged back for my views.

I can already tell though that I am going to be the most fulfilled I've ever been staying at home taking care of my husband, child and household. I'm excited to be starting this new stage of my life. One where I feel like I'll be better focused on the things I should be and being better at keeping everything in the correct balance.

God had blessed me with specific gifts and talents and they are best suited to a homemaker. I draw joy from these things. It's just wonderful to actually be able to live out what I feel God has always made me for.

Still in the back of my mind I worry about being judged by the outside world. I'm trying to put aside that fear of unexpectedness and draw strength from the truth that this is exactly where God wants me. This is my calling from Him. Now I just can't wait till I have my baby girl home with me!