Hey look I've made it back. Obviously not the same week, but only 10 days from the last time I posted. I'd say that's pretty good.
I said I wanted to write some more of the changes and struggles I'm dealing with. Honestly after the last time I wrote things started to get better. Evelyn was sleeping longer stretches and going down at night just fine. Well last week about this time things took a drastic turn for the worst. Slowly they are getting better. Only as long as Evelyn is sleeping in bed with us (yes I know you shouldn't do that, but I'm desperate) or sleeping in her swing. Sigh...I don't know how we will ever get her to sleep in her room.
Yesterday though I made a decision. I could either sit and wallow and cry about how much harder this parenting thing is than I thought it would be. Or I could pick myself up and be happy for even just the 15 minutes of napping I could get out of Evelyn. (I forgot to mention she wasn't napping either.) Surprisingly I got a 2.5 hour nap out of her yesterday afternoon. After 3 days of no napping besides 30 minute bursts it was glorious. I just kept telling myself, "Even if I just get 10 more minutes, I'm going to be grateful instead of mad that she didn't sleep long enough." While I'm not expecting that to happen everyday, it was a nice break and I repeatedly thanked God for it.
I'm also trying to make sure I spend time praying when I get those few spare moments to myself. Even if I have loads of other things that I could be getting done I've just realized that I've really been neglecting my relationship with God lately & it's having a negative effect on my outlook on things. So I'm hoping that will keep my spirit encouraged so that I can weather this season of my little ones life.
Now for something I'm very Thankful/Joyful about. Right now my husband is on his way to a job interview. He's had a few of them the last couple of weeks & we're just holding out and trusting that God will give him a job by the end of the month.
Right now the baby is waking up so I'd better be done. Maybe I'll write again next week. We'll see!
such a great idea to focus on your relationship with God--goodness knows i could do more of the same thing.
ReplyDeletealso, i felt the exact same way when both of my kids were born. it was like "wait, why didn't anyone tell me it was going to be this hard?" no one told me i'd fall asleep breastfeeding in the middle of the night and wake up in a puddle of my own breastmilk. i felt like such a failure. i'm glad you're keeping focused on God and the positive!
where are you guys now? we live in your old neighborhood now, and every time i drive past your old house i remember coming to your barbeque that one time :) congratulations on your baby! she's beautiful!
let's catch up, yeah? :)